PRAISE V FLATTERY

It is a norm in any society that one would be greeted and congratulated on assuming a new important or sensitive assignment. The year was 2002 when I was put in charge of a portfolio which was considered as prestigious to say the least. Persons around me eulogised my invisible capabilities and should there me a mention about me being transported to cloud nine not for the posting but for the ubiquitous qualities which were being recognised (as I thought). The whole charade came down as a house of cards when a senior colleague called me up and told me that it is time I landed on Planet Earth though he would prefer me to delve into the netherworlds by a couple of miles. He warned me that there was a vast difference between the terms praise and flattery. "Praise" he said, " was the recognition of existing qualities. This would be not necessary unless one feels that his qualities needs to be recognised and felicitated." He added that the persons who feel such a need were narcissists by nature and he did not expect me to fall under this category. Flattery on the other hand he said was the seeming recognition of the non-existing qualities.After a long prologue he gave me an example that if someone were to tell me that it was only I who could identify such matters which require great intellect then I could be rest assured that the person was resorting to flattery. He asked me to remind myself that I could not be the only one who could see a white elephant standing in front of a whole crowd as against identifying an ant on the ground. The euphoria died down and what would have been otherwise termed as a dampener appeared to me as the most valuable counsel that one could expect at this juncture.

Immediately thereafter another well wisher called me and counselled me that the portfolio required the tact of an eel, the eye of a hawk and the humility of a farmer. He reassured me that the expectations though high would be met with diligent work. However, he emphasised that I would remain on his radar for the times to come to ensure that I did not falter. These reassuring words made me confident that there were at least two well wishers who would venture to steady this boat when it is rocked.

These words reminded me of the words of Sant Kabirdas who had said in a couplet that it is best to keep a person who sings praises afar and make the person who finds faults one's neighbour. What would he have said of flattery?

We do live in times when flattery is taken more kindly than the words of wisdom. How would one rate the verdict of Birbal that a king is more powerful than God since he could banish one out of his kingdom while God could not. Was it not tactful flattery? The reward was of course immediate. However, I still believe that my well wishers have done me good by putting me on a firm platform and so would I where I wish one well rather than flatter them for immediate pleasure.